February 28, 1998

(click on play to watch video)

I cannot believe that we have been married 13 years!!!  We have shared an incredible journey together. You are an amazing husband and dad. Every single day I am so blessed by you, what a gift God has given me! 

Sometimes I love you so much I feel like I could burst! =) I love you more with each passing day~Happy 13th Anniversary!!!

Love,

Jen

Whole Hand Day

Hard to believe that Jackson (better known as JJ) celebrated turning 5 today. I seem to say this all the time, but really where does the time go?  It was a pretty low-key day as we are having a little get-together later next week to celebrate Wesley and JJ's Birthday's together.  JJ wasn't feeling the greatest today but he tried to enjoy the fact that it was "whole hand day".  =)

I'm 5!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!





JJ doing his Star War pose with his new
Leapster Star Wars





This is how we ended the night, a lovely breathing treatment
to hopefully bring some relief.  Quite the sad face!!



Sad attempt at JJ's cake, of course when you have a 20-month

old hanging on your leg and 4 other boys wanting to 'help' I

guess that is what happens. (The green blob is supposed

to be a soccer ball getting kicked into the net, the green 'S' is

for State). And now you see why I will never work in a bakery!!

How To Train A Dragon T-shirt...my awesome $1.00
clearance find at Wal Mart.  After JJ opened it Caleb wanted
to try it on....too bad the opening of the shirt wouldn't fit
over Caleb's HUGE head!!

Walk Between The Lines

Deuteronomy 6: 6-9 The Message

 Write these commandments that I've given you today on your hearts. Get them inside of you and then get them inside your children. Talk about them wherever you are, sitting at home or walking in the street; talk about them from the time you get up in the morning to when you fall into bed at night. Tie them on your hands and foreheads as a reminder; inscribe them on the doorposts of your homes and on your city gates.

Joshua 1: 1-9 The Message

 After the death of Moses the servant of God, God spoke to Joshua, Moses' assistant:

"Moses my servant is dead. Get going. Cross this Jordan River, you and all the people. Cross to the country I'm giving to the People of Israel. I'm giving you every square inch of the land you set your foot on—just as I promised Moses. From the wilderness and this Lebanon east to the Great River, the Euphrates River—all the Hittite country—and then west to the Great Sea. It's all yours. All your life, no one will be able to hold out against you. In the same way I was with Moses, I'll be with you. I won't give up on you; I won't leave you. Strength! Courage! You are going to lead this people to inherit the land that I promised to give their ancestors. Give it everything you have, heart and soul. Make sure you carry out The Revelation that Moses commanded you, every bit of it. Don't get off track, either left or right, so as to make sure you get to where you're going. And don't for a minute let this Book of The Revelation be out of mind. Ponder and meditate on it day and night, making sure you practice everything written in it. Then you'll get where you're going; then you'll succeed. Haven't I commanded you? Strength! Courage! Don't be timid; don't get discouraged. God, your God, is with you every step you take."


Walk Between The Lines~Russ Taff

When the night breaks in I won't spin
Far away from what I know is real
In this heart of mine
Light will shine
For I have found my chart to pilot me

Walk between the lines
Through this life and times
My heart is hitting hard upon your Word
Walk between the lines
Seeing surer signs
My heart is hidden deep between the lines

When the days ahead seem full of dread
And I'm afraid of what the future finds
There's this place I know I can go
I'll find the peace to clear my clouded mind

Walk between the lines
Through this life and times
My heart is hitting hard upon your Word
Walk between the lines
Finding deeper minds
My heart is hidden deep between the lines

Protected, protected in your arms

When the night breaks in I won't spin
So far away from what I know is real
If my friends turn away I won't sway
For I have found my chart to pilot me

Walk between the lines
Through this life and times
My heart is hitting hard upon your Word
Walk between the lines
Finding deeper minds
My heart is hidden deep between the lines
Walk between the lines

Through this life and times
My heart is hitting hard upon your Word
Walk between the lines
Seeing surer signs
My heart is hidden deep between the lines

Today my heart is deeply hidden between the lines.

I have listened to this song over and over (and over) this past week. It's been on my kitchen radio, it's on my mp3 player. (I even caught myself singing it out loud when running the other day). I have many, many favorite songs/artists but this is right at the top.  My favorite radio station had 'way back Wednesday' this week. Listeners got to request old songs that they haven't heard in awhile. How cool did my kids think it was when they heard the DJ say my name and then start playing this song.  =)  Hopefully it ministered to someone the way it has to me over the past several days. (Or should I say years??!!)

Evidence Of Love ~ First Call (1993)

Love

1 Corinthians 13 (The Message)

The Way of Love

 If I speak with human eloquence and angelic ecstasy but don't love, I'm nothing but the creaking of a rusty gate. If I speak God's Word with power, revealing all his mysteries and making everything plain as day, and if I have faith that says to a mountain, "Jump," and it jumps, but I don't love, I'm nothing. If I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don't love, I've gotten nowhere. So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I'm bankrupt without love.

Love never gives up.
Love cares more for others than for self.
Love doesn't want what it doesn't have.
Love doesn't strut,
Doesn't have a swelled head,
Doesn't force itself on others,
Isn't always "me first,"
Doesn't fly off the handle,
Doesn't keep score of the sins of others,
Doesn't revel when others grovel,
Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
Puts up with anything,
Trusts God always,
Always looks for the best,
Never looks back,
But keeps going to the end.
Love never dies.

Inspired speech will be over some day; praying in tongues will end; understanding will reach its limit. We know only a portion of the truth, and what we say about God is always incomplete. But when the Complete arrives, our incompletes will be canceled.

When I was an infant at my mother's breast, I gurgled and cooed like any infant. When I grew up, I left those infant ways for good.

We don't yet see things clearly. We're squinting in a fog, peering through a mist. But it won't be long before the weather clears and the sun shines bright! We'll see it all then, see it all as clearly as God sees us, knowing him directly just as he knows us!

But for right now, until that completeness, we have three things to do to lead us toward that consummation: Trust steadily in God, hope unswervingly, love extravagantly. And the best of the three is love.

Weekend

Part of Wesley and JJ's Birthday present was to go see the Monster Trucks. Lots of fun!!

Caleb made it through the first half, then the very tired
and very cranky baby just couldn't handle it anymore.
So out we went to sit in the van while the boys watched
almost all of the second half.

What better way to end the weekend with God painting the sky so beautiful!!

The snow is melting!!! I got to run two days in a row outside. Today included a 6 mile run on almost snow and ice free pavement. It was glorious. =)  I am ready for Spring!!!  The boys had tons of fun playing outside yesterday. While they are anxious for Spring too I don't think they are quite ready to say goodbye to Winter completely. They had fun working on their snow fort and snowmobiling with Dad.

I Will Stand By You ~ Rachel Rachel (1991)

Old video/song, but still amazing lyrics that have meant so much to me over the years...and still do today.

Vaporized Children and A Missing Tooth

I told Wesley to go lay out his clothes for school for the next day. This is what I saw when I walked around the corner. He said he was vaporized...

Jackson lost his first tooth right before he turns 5.  He is following in his big brother's footsteps and lost his tooth early...but he also got them early. He is SO proud!!!





Oh Crazy Days!!!

Last week we had a record snowfall of 18 inches. The boys had two days off from school. I spent 4 1/2 hours snow blowing and another 1/2 hour shoveling off the deck.



Standing in a snowdrift...or should I say stuck in a snowdrift??

Trying to get out of the snowdrift!!

I came down with strep throat and was super sick the night of my snow blowing frenzy. All I wanted to do was go to sleep but the beginning of my fever and burning throat prevented me from getting more than a few hours. I cannot remember a time when I have felt so incredibly awful from an illness. I am not one to just lay around and take it easy, however there was simply no choice.  I could not get off the couch. I am so thankful for amazing, wonderful kids that got along so well on their day off from school and for Ethan who took such good care of his brothers.  He got them all lunch, took care of cleaning up the kitchen and was my 'go-to guy' for helping out when I needed something.  How I wish certain people could have been in my house that day to just observe what went on...maybe they would have a different opinion about my children and say words to them that build them up, instead of tearing them down.

After 15 days of not being able to run I was finally able to get outside and run around my neighborhood.  I told myself I would just go for a nice, gentle run but then I started to laugh when this song came on my mp3 player....this is not a gentle, take it easy kind of song. =) 



We're still in the middle of crazy days.  Kindergarten screening, groceries, birthday's, a million loads of laundry, oh the JOYS of it all!!! Lovin' it, embracing it, cherishing it.

With Everything

Beautiful

Have you ever been so unloved, uncared for? Have you ever tried so hard to be accepted, but you keep being shut out? Have you ever had a message sent that could not get any louder or be any more clear by someones words or actions?

I'm sure lots of people have and if you're anything at all like me it leaves you broken. Especially when you always thought they would.  It would just be this automatic thing...someday.....maybe???

God likes to make beautiful things out of B R O K E N pieces.

I have heard this song a hundred times, but today I actually HEARD it.





The light bulb inside my head went off and God spoke to me about a huge burden I have had for so long.  For certain person(s) I will never measure up to whatever standards they have set. It's quite clear I'm not accepted, not loved and uncared for. It's caused a hurt so deep inside of me sometimes it's all I can do to keep holding on to God and pursuing what I know is the right thing for me to do. (Which, by the way is to keep loving them.) I know that in the Lord's eyes I am a beautiful person whom he deeply, deeply loves. The standards I have to live up to are HIS standards, no one else matters. The world makes you feel as if you have to fit this perfect mold to be accepted. God says, come just as you are.  I have a HOPE. I have a PEACE. I have a FAITH that remains unshakable.

Jesus, you loved me enough to die....so that I may live.

I am a child of the King and that makes me B E A U T I F U L.