When I worked there one of my many jobs was Children's Activities Director. I grew to absolutely love that part of my job. I was a very quiet, shy person back then (I know....very hard to believe that one huh??!!) But doing that job definitely made me have to come out of my 'shell'. I still remember having to announce my first activity over the campground speaker....talk about being completely freaked out!!! Hearing your voice going out over the whole entire campground was definitely a strange thing....that thankfully I got used to very quickly.
I was very, very blessed to have been asked to help lead a few of the activities while we were camping out there. I had a great time...and oh how the memories of six amazing Summers came flooding back! (I even got to announce the activities...just like old times). =)
I realized though just how much older I am than the last time I did a wagon ride....just look at the pictures!!! Fifteen years ago was the last time I had done one...I had less wrinkles, no grey hair, and no cottage cheese thighs. I also could get up and out of the wagon without any aches and pains....not so much this time around!!
School is back in full force, the boys seem to be back in the swing of things. Getting back into their routines both in and out of school. I just cannot believe how fast Summer seemed to fly by this year. Faster than ever I think!!
I am having a hard week this week. I thought I'd be able to be strong(er) as I approach what was to be our due date with baby #7, but I'll admit it's not that easy. In fact I've been trying to write a blog post for the past several days but my mind is just all over the place and I cannot pluck the right words out of my head. I'm a jumbled mix of emotions and feelings that simply many cannot understand.
I have had so many comments the last several weeks by people who have learned of our story of 3 miscarriages this year and they've quite clearly shared their opinion(s) of what they think I should be feeling or how to proceed. All I can say to those people is 1) those comments hurt deeply 2) it is between Chad & I and my Doctor to determine what is in our best interest and 3) We're NOT ready to give up on what God can will do. 4) We would much rather have your prayers laid upon us, than your opinions.
We have never, ever at any time tried to have 'another' one because we feel gypped that we didn't get that girl yet. We do not want to have another one because we are not grateful enough for the 5 children God has given to us. We do not want another baby because we are such perfect parents (do you hear me laughing!!!) and deserve it.
We simply do not deserve anything we have, it is all from our Father above. We are so, so blessed. I look at my life and cannot thank God enough for what He's given to me. But yes, we still would absolutely love to welcome another little life into our arms.
So, if I could ask one thing of the people that know our family and love us. Simply pray for us, and if you don't have anything nice to say then just don't say it.
Some of you know about the appointment I have coming up....please pray specifically for the time I will be meeting with the Doctor. Pray for him to ask the 'right' questions in the short time we will have together. Pray for my ability to remember anything he really needs to know. I feel like so much has gone on in the last 12 months and he doesn't know any of my history so it's up to me to get it out of my head and into his....and just maybe he will have some idea of how to proceed with me.
I am complex!!! =)
Thank you for being a part of my life, for your encouragement. Most of all thank you for uplifting us to a most Holy God. A God who knows the rest of the story...and continues to reveal it in His time.
Thank you for being a part of my life, for your encouragement. Most of all thank you for uplifting us to a most Holy God. A God who knows the rest of the story...and continues to reveal it in His time.
